Players Only...Good Game on Craiglist...Mad funny!!

PAUL CAINE · 10-05-2009, 01:41 AM

Below is a posting from Craig’s List from a chic who is trying to find herself a husband, and then a guy actually responded to it…Madddd funny

The Original Post

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy.
I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think
I’m overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars,
restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest
way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front
about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

It’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial
interests
PostingID: 432279810

THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully
about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your
bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I
see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a
crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to ‘buy you’ (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as ‘articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful’ as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500 K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way.
Classic ‘pump and dump.’
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of
lease, let me know.

e-playa · 10-05-2009, 04:22 PM

Shyne · 10-05-2009, 04:31 PM

wow...that was probably one of the best owns ive ever read...like that dude just really went in on her...damn

The Bad Guy · 10-05-2009, 04:38 PM

lmao she responded?

BuckEm · 11-11-2009, 04:23 AM

Lmaoooooooo thats shit was mad funny, glad i didnt skip this

FacilDinero · 11-11-2009, 11:00 AM

Lmfaoooo.....

Gunners · 11-11-2009, 01:55 PM

LMAO

DaDizzle · 11-11-2009, 03:32 PM

Holy shit. Wow. That's new.

Lucki · 11-13-2009, 05:23 PM

ahahahaha o.o

10-05-2009, 01:41 AM	#1
PAUL CAINE Pauly Soprano!! Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Eastside El-Barrio Wagner P's Posts: 3,976 Repped: 1,321 Repped 633 Times in 405 Posts Neg Reps: 87 Neg Repped at 121 Times in 78 Posts	Players Only...Good Game on Craiglist...Mad funny!! Players Only...Good Game on Craiglist...Mad funny!! Below is a posting from Craig’s List from a chic who is trying to find herself a husband, and then a guy actually responded to it…Madddd funny The Original Post What am I doing wrong? Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy. I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all. Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level? Here are my questions specifically: - Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms -What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings -Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)? - Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story there? - Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out? - How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth. It’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests PostingID: 432279810 THE ANSWER Dear Pers-431649184: I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I see it. Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful! So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you! So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to ‘buy you’ (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage. Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as ‘articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful’ as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500 K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout. By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation. With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way. Classic ‘pump and dump.’ I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know. __________________

10-05-2009, 04:22 PM	#2
e-playa Veteran Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Europe-$lovenia Posts: 2,467 Repped: 478 Repped 406 Times in 210 Posts Neg Reps: 26 Neg Repped at 32 Times in 24 Posts	__________________

10-05-2009, 04:31 PM	#3
Shyne Sons Of Liberty Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Iowa Posts: 5,552 Repped: 3 Repped 2,054 Times in 849 Posts Neg Reps: 0 Neg Repped at 151 Times in 95 Posts	wow...that was probably one of the best owns ive ever read...like that dude just really went in on her...damn __________________ myspace.com/vocabthemc http://coldglassofoj.blogspot.com

10-05-2009, 04:38 PM	#4
The Bad Guy Veteran Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: At World's End Posts: 3,224 Repped: 1,213 Repped 1,023 Times in 325 Posts Neg Reps: 247 Neg Repped at 118 Times in 83 Posts	lmao she responded? __________________ We all die one day, but as long as I'm here I'm gone grab checks. I make my cash stretch longer than giraffe necks.

11-11-2009, 04:23 AM	#5
BuckEm Veteran Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 4,017 Repped: 1,431 Repped 621 Times in 233 Posts Neg Reps: 41 Neg Repped at 209 Times in 99 Posts	Lmaoooooooo thats shit was mad funny, glad i didnt skip this __________________ I dumped slugs and killed a Cop-Quickly// And his partner got stuck with a halo too (Halo 2) like he aint have a Xbox-360// Buckem - A.K.A. ME

11-11-2009, 11:00 AM	#6
FacilDinero EasyMoney™ Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Queens Posts: 3,928 Repped: 960 Repped 744 Times in 453 Posts Neg Reps: 260 Neg Repped at 230 Times in 157 Posts	Lmfaoooo..... __________________ Hawks: 11-2

11-11-2009, 01:55 PM	#7
Gunners Super Moderatоr Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Yu Kay Posts: 8,460 Repped: 3,063 Repped 948 Times in 268 Posts Neg Reps: 18 Neg Repped at 22 Times in 17 Posts	LMAO __________________

11-11-2009, 03:32 PM	#8
DaDizzle Bush me Douche Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Florida Posts: 4,535 Repped: 87 Repped 774 Times in 338 Posts Neg Reps: 130 Neg Repped at 93 Times in 74 Posts	Holy shit. Wow. That's new. __________________

11-13-2009, 05:23 PM	#9
Lucki Veteran Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: P-Town, AZ Posts: 2,729 Repped: 2,271 Repped 49 Times in 19 Posts Neg Reps: 104 Neg Repped at 13 Times in 6 Posts	ahahahaha o.o

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