Yung MiZfit

\*Flash* I Hit Da Gas Den I Peeled Off Quick/
\Threw Da Gun Out Da Window Dat I Killed Dawg Wit/
\Mind Iz Racin...Cant Get It Outta Mah Head/
\But If I Let It Get 2 Me Den Im Ridin Wit Fedz/
\N I Aint Tryna Do Time In Da Pen/
\So I Speed Up, Car Dont See Us, I Collided Wit Dem/
\A Dead Nigga In Da Passenger, Fuck Him, I Gotta Go/
\Climb Out Da Shattered Windshield N Hit A Side Road/
\Sirens Gettin Louder...Iz It Paramedicz Or 5~0/
\All I Know Iz Dat Itz Followin Me Where Eva I Go/
\Fatigued..Hoppin Ova Gatez...Dogz Iz Barkin/
\Fuck...I Know An Old Lady Gon Call Da Law N/
\I Aint Got Time 4 It, So I Reach For My Pants/
\Fumblin With My Fone And Call Up My Manz/
\Told Him To "Meet Me At The Top Of The Road", He Like, "4 Wut/
\Told Him To "Hurry The Fuck Up, Bring Da Whip" And Hung Up/

Komplex

\N I Aint Tryna Do Time In Da Pen/
\So I Speed Up, Car Dont See Us, I Collided Wit Dem/
\A Dead Nigga In Da Passenger, Fuck Him, I Gotta Go/
\Climb Out Da Shattered Windshield N Hit A Side Road/
\Sirens Gettin Louder...Iz It Paramedicz Or 5~0/
\All I Know Iz Dat Itz Followin Me Where Eva I Go/

the middle part of the verse was the most intense and that's when the story was at it's highest point. I like how u ended the verse with a cliffhanger too. good story. stay up.

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"Set up to be a loser but was made to be a winner
If they paint Hip Hop I bet my face be in the picture
If they wrote a Rap Bible bet my name be in the scriptures
If shorty say I'm her Idol, bet her face be in my zipper"-Joell Ortiz

killa_cam

yessir, intriging storyline...

the multies and rhyme pattern was good.
choice of words was also good to build suspence.
good ending to part 1


ill look out for part 2.

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ghost


Free Meta!

HoodstarSwish

Fire!!!!!!

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I Get Money, Money I Got, I-I Get It!

Yung MiZfit

thankz duke...uppin